Losing her virginity

nervous first time

We’d listen to our music, drink the coffee and lie on the floor again. Then one day she suggested that we go to her bedroom. Her parents weren’t due back for hours. My heart raced. I knew that the moment was near. We walked silently hand-in- hand down the hallway, kissing as we entered her room.

There we stood facing each other, kissing as we always did, playing and tugging at our clothes as if we were experts, but neither of us was committed to removing a thread of clothing. We’d been in the room for an eternity before she took a step back and slowly unzipped her skirt. It fell to her feet. She then reached behind her back, unclasped her bra, pulled a strap over a shoulder and then extracted it over her arm through one armhole of her top. She dropped it to one side, came back to me, gave me another long kiss and then lifted her top over her head.

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And there they were. For the first time since puberty, two new butterflies emerged from cocoons. They unfurled their wings and revealed nature’s wonder. I wanted to stare at those two beautiful creatures forever but politeness lifted my eyes to hers. I watched her turn and walk towards the bed. She sat on its edge and gestured for me to come over.

Before I’d considered what to do she reached for my pants—pulling them down, manoeuvring them over the throbbing obstacle in front. It bounced up into sight and I wondered what she thought of it. Did she see an emerging butterfly too? I couldn’t tell. She was just as kind and lifted her eyes to mine. I suppose she felt the same mix of politeness and shyness.

I undressed myself completely and looked at her lying on her bed. She smiled back. She had one tiny triangle of fabric left on her body—a cocoon that covered one last miracle. She lifted herself so I could ease it off… and there it was, perfect and pure. I managed a new state of hardness after that.

There are no words to describe how the uniting feels, not really. As it is, uniting does it no justice. Forget about lovemaking, sex, fuck and orgasm too. The difference between going in and being in is so great that it consumes every vernacular in a dictionary. There are no words left for what comes after. It’s beyond words, beyond precious!

So it was that within the blink of an eye, in our private moment, we crossed over and each left our childhood behind. We had transcended. We walked as adults. Soon Nina’s sanctuary became mine to visit time and time again.

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Oxygen craving.

Screenshot_2014-02-25-07-59-28“Take this!” I said, pushing her hard against the wall, kissing her deeply, penetrating her body, probing her mouth, stealing what I could from her. She gasped for oxygen but I drew her back in, pressing my face against her nose so she couldn’t get it. If she thought I was being passionate then she would’ve been dangerously wrong. Her knees began to buckle again but I wasn’t letting her have her own away this time.

“No you don’t. No fucking way. You stand up. You face me and take this. Come on! Up! Fucking stand up!”

I turned the water off, grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into the bedroom still dripping wet. I tossed her onto the mattress, spread her legs apart and said, “You’ll take whatever I give to you and more, right?”

More here in SEETHINGS.

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